Free Magazines

A few months ago I received an invitation from Continental Airlines to cash in my unused miles on a selection of magazines and journals. I wasn't sure when I had last flown Continental but my 19,000 miles was just short of a free ticket. The miles were set to expire and with little travel in the near future I decided to take them up on their offer. If there's one thing any household needs it is a great selection of monthly magazines.

I began by picking the obvious. Maxim, Sports Illustrated. Then the picking got tough. These two selections only used 2,000 miles so more selections had to be made. Inc., Sunset, Cigar Aficionado, Health, This Old House, Electronic House, W Magazine all brought me to 11,000 miles. It was time to pull out the big guns. Daily delivery of the Wall Street Journal; 2,500 miles. Who cared if I had no interest in finances or Wall Street, I was getting closer. Travel and Leisure, Food and Wine, and Details and now I was getting someplace. Only 900 more points and yes, there it was. 12 months of Essence for 850 points. I had spent my miles.

As I reviewed my selections I began to realize that anyone doing research on magazine subscriptions would be able to accurately build a profile of me. I'm sure so marketing or advertising firm would love to get their hands on my reading profile. Here's what I think mine says about me. I am a large gay man married with a wife and kids who loves to smoke, travel, eat, and exercise. I am also black and a wealthy small business owner who is retired and loves crafts. NAILED ME!

As my magazines started to arrive I have realized I don't have the time to read magazines and really don't like any of the ones I have subscribed to. For the most part they are not entertaining and not well written. The only good that has come from any of the magazines was an article in the September 2009 issue of Details titled, "Are you to old for a six-pack?" Not knowing which six-pack they were referring to, I had to find out. Turns out it was the one I have never had. What the article explained was that "the sweet spot for a washboard stomach is between the ages of 15 and 35. After that, there's no need to try hard." Finally my vindication for 40 years of not doing 500 sit ups a day. If anything was gained by subscribing to 15 magazines it was that I no longer need washboard abs. Thank you Continental Airlines and thank you Details Magazine.